Have you ever been so done?
Like the type of feeling where you’ve given it your absolute all & it still is not enough?
Where you have nothing left in your heart and soul to give?
Well, Welcome to the everyday struggle of a Brown Girl. [probably everywhere, but I won’t generalize.]
Maybe it’s a blessing or a curse. But God himself, decided to fill us with so much unconditional love that it somehow got misinterpreted as our greatest weakness. So unconditional that rather than confront the injustice, we take it and find it within ourselves to heal and start fresh the next day as if nothing happened. As if you didn’t feel like completely giving up the night before. The type of love where you find yourself giving and giving, and then giving some more, only to find out you’re not appreciated and are taken completely for granted.
But still afterwards, you find yourself feeling bad for the person who hurt you, or the need to mend the situation for peace sake and move on. But see, that is not love. Rather, it’s quite the opposite. That is just a toxic cycle made out to be portrayed as love.
Real Love starts with yourself.
If you can’t find love within yourself, the love you give off (& attract) will always be conditional and short-lived – temporary. Always based on a set of rules, conditions and expectations. Unconditional love, on the other hand, is given freely, no matter the situation. Where the love naturally overflows from the inside out.
But in order to be able to give unconditional love to others, you have to have enough pouring into yourself first! And that is most definitely an inside job.
“You can’t pour from an empty cup.”
So I guess, after it is all said and done, maybe it is a blessing to be able to spread love in a world where it is so desperately needed.